So John Lennon walks into the Whiskey, and I say imagine that John.... imagine that.

Lennon writes a song about peace and human condition and gets gunned down by a human with no inner peace. Imagine that, John.

The southern Redneck takes Hollywood --

(thick southern drawl....)


"So I'm walkin' down the boulevard minding my own business, and day night dawn to light it is packed. I'm pushin' my way through and soon I bump into this guy in black who says his name is 'Darth Vader'. I think well, it's Hollywood. I've heard wackier names. I say, what, did ur father not like you or somethin'....And he replies in a low voice --

"I AM NOT YOUR FATHER".

And I say well I didn't ask you if you were my father or not... I asked you if your father liked you or not, now get the hell out of the way! I'm in a hurry! Then he pulls out this long red thing from his pocket, and I'm like what.... is that a dildo or something?? that's sick man... I don't have time for this.... move it...

Next thing I know... superman flies out of nowhere. And i'm like... hey man.... I thought you died?? oh wait... that's Christopher Reeves. Anyways, I don't mind superman that much, it's that bitch Lois Lane that really sticks in my craw...

Danglin' from a helicopter on a skyscraper... and here comes superman. Hangin' from an elevator with dynamite strapped to her chest.... here comes superman.... sinkin' in the earth, trapped in a car, dead...and superman not only finds her -- but he spins the whole earth around backwards for her... now that's loyalty.
Kind of ruins love for the rest of us...

Next thing I know spiderman weaves a web around me. And finally I'm like --- Don't ya'll actors have anything better to do with your time then dress up as super heroes for tips??..... Hollywood....